Rather than update you on recent situations in my life I am going to post a few links to songs. These songs are my feelings right now...
How I am feeling at this moment...
Don't Want to Cry for You - Pete Yorn
My Dad loves this guy... I never liked anything by him, but this one hit home today...
He Stopped Loving Her Today - George Jones
How it could of been... How it felt... All smiles... All the Time...
You and I - Ingrid Michaelson
Does this one represent his feelings?
You Could Be Happy - Snow Patrol
In the end though....
I will survive - Gloria Gaynor
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Frustration!!!
Lately due to many things going on in my life I have found myself EXTREMELY frustrated. I have decided that the frustration is the result of some of the events/people around me. I read a few helpful hints to help me deal with this frustration and I thought I would share them in case any of you are feeling the same way. I put them into my own words and compiled them for you.
There is always a source to the frustration. Something/someone is causing you to feel like you are about to BURST.
Take a deep breath and step back
You need to be able to react responsibly to what is happening around you. Don't act on impulse, you will end up making a fool of yourself and in the end not be happy with the result. This will result not only with your own disappoint in this situation, but it will also hurt you in future situations.
You need to step back and be able to see that what is happening is completely separate than the meaning you are giving it. The meaning that you are assigning to the situation is what is fueling your frustration.
No one wants to hear just YOUR opinion. You have to be able to see that you are not the only person involved and this will bring you to the next step and hopefully move forward to a solution for all parties.
Speak Up
The phrase I am going to try using in my situations is "This isn't working for me".
Whether the situation has to do with a person, a process, or a place you can use this phrase to start the conversation and explain your frustration. By opening this door you will hopefully be headed toward a mutual solution. Also this phrase keeps you from pointing fingers at one person.
Have a solution that DOES work for you
It is easy to speak your mind and just get everything off your chest, but does that honestly make you feel better? Before starting the conversation make sure that you have a solution/plan of action that works for you. Seriously think about YOUR solution and think about how you can explain that it is better for everyone.
Be Open to a Solution that is Best for EVERYONE
Hopefully after you speak up there will be communication about different solutions to the issue. After a decission is made whether it is exactly what you wanted or not you still have a choice.
The choices consist of:
1. Change the situation
2. Change your perception of the situation
3. Cope with the situation
4. Leave the situation
Before you make your choice take another step back and separate the way you perceive the situation and the situation itself.
After you make your decision STICK TO IT! It is okay to ask yourself "What have I learned from this" or "What would I do different next time", but do not go back on your choice.
Good thought to end on -
Frustration occurs right before you learn something BIG!
The bigger the frustration the bigger you WIN!
I'm going to end my week by getting a grip on everything that is currently frustrating me. I am going to calm down, ask the questions, state the facts, wait for the outcome, make a choice, and STICK TO IT!
The End
There is always a source to the frustration. Something/someone is causing you to feel like you are about to BURST.
Take a deep breath and step back
You need to be able to react responsibly to what is happening around you. Don't act on impulse, you will end up making a fool of yourself and in the end not be happy with the result. This will result not only with your own disappoint in this situation, but it will also hurt you in future situations.
You need to step back and be able to see that what is happening is completely separate than the meaning you are giving it. The meaning that you are assigning to the situation is what is fueling your frustration.
No one wants to hear just YOUR opinion. You have to be able to see that you are not the only person involved and this will bring you to the next step and hopefully move forward to a solution for all parties.
Speak Up
The phrase I am going to try using in my situations is "This isn't working for me".
Whether the situation has to do with a person, a process, or a place you can use this phrase to start the conversation and explain your frustration. By opening this door you will hopefully be headed toward a mutual solution. Also this phrase keeps you from pointing fingers at one person.
Have a solution that DOES work for you
It is easy to speak your mind and just get everything off your chest, but does that honestly make you feel better? Before starting the conversation make sure that you have a solution/plan of action that works for you. Seriously think about YOUR solution and think about how you can explain that it is better for everyone.
Be Open to a Solution that is Best for EVERYONE
Hopefully after you speak up there will be communication about different solutions to the issue. After a decission is made whether it is exactly what you wanted or not you still have a choice.
The choices consist of:
1. Change the situation
2. Change your perception of the situation
3. Cope with the situation
4. Leave the situation
Before you make your choice take another step back and separate the way you perceive the situation and the situation itself.
After you make your decision STICK TO IT! It is okay to ask yourself "What have I learned from this" or "What would I do different next time", but do not go back on your choice.
Good thought to end on -
Frustration occurs right before you learn something BIG!
The bigger the frustration the bigger you WIN!
I'm going to end my week by getting a grip on everything that is currently frustrating me. I am going to calm down, ask the questions, state the facts, wait for the outcome, make a choice, and STICK TO IT!
The End
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